Swiss and French drivers

Working over here and commuting backwards and forwards across the border every day, gives me the unique opportunity to see drivers from both countries strut their stuff. It’s always interesting to be an outsider looking at other countries as you see things the locals may not. ‘Wood for the trees sort of thing…’

There are mainly three types of drivers around here. Those from Geneva canton whose plates start with GE, those from Canton Vaud, whose license plates unfortunately are preceded by the initials VD (which is obviously not quite as mirthful to Francophones as it is to us Anglophones!), and French drivers from my ‘Departement’ whose plates end in 74 denoting the ‘Haute Savoie’ region.

Geneva drivers are fairly representative of Swiss drivers and the national psyche in general in that they tend to be very (sometimes overly) efficient. Be a second too slow off the lights when they turn green and they are soon leaning on the horn. ‘The light is green, you should be going!’. Commit a minor offence such as drift into what they now consider to be their lane on one of those ‘3-into-2’ merge roads, and they will sound their horn at the transgressing driver with the same outraged indignation as if you had just suggested copping a quick feel of their sainted mother (the fact that the car concerned may sport a yellow (French) license plate seems to be an added incentive to double the length and intensity of any klaxoning to show their wounded feelings). No doubt the French comfort themselves with the idea that their nuclear ‘’Force de frappe’ could be much more usefully engaged targeting that pesky Genevois bureaucrat in the green Audi!

People from Canton Vaud are of an altogether different genre. This Canton is the one that runs along the north shore of Lake Geneva (the south shore being the French side is called the Cote D’or or ‘Golden coast’) and is where the Swiss well to do live. These folks are all the investment bankers and wealthy industrialists of the region and boy do some of them have the attitude to go with it. Check the plate of the Porsche roaring ahead of you at the lights only to come cutting back in front a micro second later and it’s probably from Canton Vaud. The BMW blasting down the fast lane of the auto-route and flashing at you when you don’t get back in the medium/slow lane fast enough…Canton Vaud. It’s as if they all have this genetic ‘I’m rich/important/Swiss - get out of my way' attitude. I occasionally have visions of gilded 18th century carriages carrying the upper classes galloping through the cobbled streets and scattering the proletariat before them. Feel free to throw in the term ‘Peasant’ at the end of the ‘make way’ statement now and again. ‘Beggin’ your majesties pardon Milord…!’

French divers male and female , by contrast, come into this world with the inborn knowledge that they are the true legitimate heirs to the great Juan Manuel Fangio. They attack tights bends with the same ‘brio’ as the master himself, leaning into the turns of the local auto-route off ramp with the gusto Fangio would as he twisted around Le Mans. People using the pedestrian crossings are sometimes seen with the same bewildered amusement one would have if seeing spectators walking across Daytona mid race.’ Dammit granny, I had to stop for you – do you know that you obliged me to drop a gear?!’ Moped and scooter riders of both countries seem to be on apprenticeships to Honda racing and wring impressive performances from their tiny 50cc engines!

Generally though, they are predictable and don’t do anything too stoo-pid, not like Arab drivers in Iraq or the United Arab Emirates whose road manners, skills and attitude are of another dimension.

Dubai taxi drivers?! That’s another story for another day…